Super Tasters Taste More

"It's WHAT you like, not what you ARE like, that's important." Rob Gordon, High Fidelity

Sharing your taste with somebody can be a great way of letting them get to know you. Example: If you know that my favorite movie is "Life is Beautiful" and that I have no desire to see the new "Incredible Hulk" movie, you've learned something about who I am. If I told you that I loved ALL movies, what would you learn? Well, either that I am a liar, or that I'm incredibly boring. Either way, it hurts your desire to continue getting to know me.

That point seems pretty obvious to people when we talk about books or films, but I frequently get responses like this in regards to music.

People tell me that they love ALL music. They might go as far as to eliminate a genre or two (mainly country or rap) so that there is SOME dimension to their personality from the statement they've provided. One problem is that it's not true. The other problem with this answer is what it represents. We WANT to be viewed as open-minded, broad thinking people who have expansive tastes and are truly up for anything. You're not. I might go as far as to say that you'll LISTEN to anything. But love? No.

If you love everything than the word no longer has meaning. It does my wife no good if I love her if I also love ALL women and do not differentiate between them. Why do I love my wife? Aren't there qualities I see in her that makes her stand out, making her special to me? Absolutely. I might also love my sister, but it will be quite different from the way I love my wife. After that, I might love my friend, but my love for her would also be very different than the love I have for my wife and for my sister. There are varying degrees, and then at some point I'm going to bump into a woman that I don't particularly like being around. Maybe I don't hate, but I certainly don't love.

This is true of music if you really love any of it. It is good to know your tastes, and to think critically about them. Not so that they remain static and you preserve your favorites forever and never evolve! I believe it's possible for you to LEARN to love a certain piece of music, or a certain style of singing, or a particularly strong power chord. But you should figure out why you love something and don't care for something else, or you'll never learn anything. People want to "find themselves" or discover who they really are. Well, a window into that insight is lying right in front of you with your taste.

It actually can be a bit scary, looking yourself in the mirror and examining what you see. Maybe you like "Dream Theater" more than you think you should. Maybe you didn't like "Citizen Kane" as much as you thought you were supposed to. It can make you feel a little vulnerable putting yourself out there with any sort of opinion. But out there is where it happens, and it's where you belong. Don't hide behind a bland sheet of fake-love. Be real, be honest, and be humble. Your favorite song when you were 3 is probably not your favorite song today, so there's a very real possibility that your tastes may change. But knowing where you are today is still cool, and letting me get to know where you are is a form of intimacy, and without it our friendship is basically limp. So.... quit giving me the weak hand-shake. Just shake it!