I'm the best there is at what I do (or in this case, the only one)

This weekend I went to see X-Men: The Last Stand. I thought it was great, but that's not the subject of this post. What I wish to discuss is movie etiquette and etiquette in general.

As the film started, someone in one of the front rows opened a cell phone that blinked blue lights that could probably be seen from Asteroid M and definitely distracted me and those I was sitting with. The last time I went to the movies, a group of pre-teens in front of me sent each other text messages throughout the entire movie. So I had to make a choice: do I try to ignore it and end up annoyed throughout the whole movie? or do I do something about it?

I chose the latter. "Turn of your phone!" I yelled. He did. And immediately, I could feel the tension in the theater. My wife whispered, "I can't believe you just did that."

Why is it that those who confront rudeness are made to feel uncomfortable while the feelings of rude people are protected? A computer-animated car had just told us to turn off our phones (and if the word of an anthropomorphic automobile isn't authoritative, I don't know what is). Did this guy think that it meant everyone but him?

Let's make this a two-fold discussion:

1. What is acceptable movie etiquette? Feel free to include theater, home theater, and discussions with people who may or may not have seen the movie.

2. What should our response be when someone trespasses the boundaries?

And just for fun, what sort of movie rituals do you have? If I like a movie a lot, I'll stay in the theater until the blue ratings screen comes up.

"What's up, Doc"umentaries?

Pardon the silly title, I think I'm missing my father and my friend Josh so every pun in the world seems to bring them closer.

So last night we watched "Born into Brothels" which was our first Documentary style film. We talked some about this form of media last night, but I'd like to push into it a little further (surprised?) on here. By the way, I want to thank you all for making last night so much fun and so interesting. It was great to have some new people there as well as some familiar faces.

Regardless of the content, the Documentary format changes whatever you're watching compared with a normal fiction story. We established last night that there is no such thing as an unbiased presentation, whether it's a movie or a documentary or the evening news. If a human is involved there is bias. But what about ourselves? We're quick to judge the motives of the person deliverying the story, but what about our motives in our reception? If Michael Moore is using his bias to push information our way, we might be using our bias in rejecting it. I agree 100% that he abuses the word documentary and twists facts at times so that people cannot swallow his stuff as non-fiction. BUT, to toss aside the information presented would probably also be a mistake, and in my opinion would be driven by our desire to not be confronted by some of the things in his films. That's where our bias can effect the transfer of information.

The fact that some people who hear about slave labor in other countries say "well if it's really that bad they don't have to work there" or something along those lines is a perfect example. We don't want to be convicted, so we try to change the information so that it's more pallatable to us. So while we need to discern through what the film maker is trying to get us to believe, we need to figure out what we are actually TRYING to believe and fight through that for truth. Truth changes us. why? Because we're believing lies!!!

One other thought i had about something that was said last night was about the difference between watching a movie about depravity vs. watching it on the news. the newsabout depravity is trying to tell us what is going on out there. the movies about depravity are capable of showing us how to deal with what is going on out there, and giving us new insight. at least in my experience. people don't want to believe that's true b/c movies are just for entertainment, right? both are told with a bias, whether clear or unclear... but both still have something concrete to offer if we're willing to dig.

Good old Fashioned Love Story

My wife considers me to be a romantic guy. I always remember birthdays, anniversaries, special songs we've listened to, things like that. I tell you this so that you don't write off my thoughts further down the page as ramblings from an insensitive git. The main reason that I don't like most romantic movies is not because I don't find romance exciting, it's because I feel like they fail to deliver true romance.

There is a theme that runs through these movies which I feel people buy into pretty wholeheartedly. It glorifies your desires above all else. Any person who has had their desires infringed upon in any way is now an incomplete person, and it would be better for everybody if they found somebody who would make them complete. Or, it would be better for that person and not everybody, but that person is ultimately all that matters since that's who the star of the movie is. In fact, most of these movies involve the star being incomplete WITH somebody, not just simply incomplete all by themselves. It involves a choice between one person or another, one life or another is the way they sell it usually.

Think of some American romance movies... Casablanca, The Notebook, The Wedding Planner, Sleepless in Seattle, Brokeback Mountain... These types of movies tell the tales of people who either became complete by leaving their relationships with another, OR the tragic ones where they would've had they only but they never did so look how sad it is.

We worship ourselves and our desires naturally. Which is why this notion appeals to us above all others, that my needs are ultimately the most important. But when we give into this kind of thinking, we never will be complete no matter what choice we make or how many soul mates we find. Hollywood wants you to feel that getting everything your heart desires is what you should do, b/c they want you to buy the popcorn and soda that your heart desires.

The story is in the telling, and any of these romance stories could be told as horribly sad dramas if the other perspective was taken. We could watch Sleepless in Seattle from Bill Pullman's side of things, which is that he's a terribly nice fellow who's found his dream girl in Meg Ryan. He loves her with his whole heart and she leaves him all alone. Then he spirals down into a deep depression always blaming himself for the loss of his one true love, and the movie ends when he jumps off the empire state building to his death. Then the camera pans over and sees Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks holding hands for the first time. We would hate them. But we don't. We love them because their story is our story. Bill Pullman doesn't exist in our minds because he got in the way of the completion of Meg Ryan.

The things that you sacrifice for are the only things worth living for. It's through sacrifice that true romance is born.